1009) I’ve known you for a pretty long time, and you were always in my circle. We share so many interests and have tons of common friends and we do a lot of things together. But i don’t know, we never really talk, like, having a genuine and honest and sincere conversation. I mean… I know what you do, but now that I think about it, I guess I don’t know who you are.
So I started to think if this is even a friendship, because i can’t even open up to you about the serious stuff. But you’re always around. The jokes are always around, and so are the awkward moments like when we’re about to part ways and I don’t know if I should just wave or offer a hug. But what sucks even more is that I’ve started to like you, like a whole lot, and you have no freaking idea. I hate myself for giving in to hormones, to feelings, for having gone soft… for imagining stupid scenes where you finally say that you see me more as your <insert activity here> buddy. I hate myself for being such a girl and I hate you for being so real and unreal at the same time. And now you just make it more painful every time you include me in your plans, along with everybody else.